The Weakness of Other Gods By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

I was at the downtown outdoor mall that is on MLK Blvd. I was walking by the old movie theater that is now just a burnt out shell of a build that probably smells of urine and cooking heroin.
When by chance I walked by a soapbox preacher, I, being one that enjoys a good evangelizing stopped and listened to this man prophesize and posture in the name of the lord.
He had maybe 3 bums tottering on the brink of passing out face down on the concrete and an empty guitar box open exposing the worn red velvet. I believe was expecting hand outs for the passersby but they all wanted to stay clear of the one toothless bum that looked like he was about to puke into the case.

Deu 32:26
"I said, 'I want to cut them in pieces. I want to make people forget they ever existed.

He spoke of the END OF THE WORLD and how the end times were upon us. Screaming to passersby, asking if they were prepared for the great rapture.
He wailed about how the anti-Christ is among us right now in their very city. Just two blocks away.
Now this was good stuff. I wanted to know who the anti-Christ was maybe I could make an appointment with him and whoop his ass once before the end of the world came.

Deu 32:27
But I fear the reaction of their enemies, for their adversaries would misunderstand and say, "Our power is great, and the Lord has not done all this!"'

Deu 32:28
They are a nation devoid of wisdom, and there is no understanding among them.

As that would be the match of the all eternity. Reverend John Sleestaxx whoops the ass of the Satan's son. He has already made Satan cry numerous times on the ball field. Why not his son?
The preacher then rambled on about the quotes in the bible on tithe and taxes, and tributes to the lord.
And there it was a hand full of change dropped into the case by a smartly dressed business man in a hurry.
The bums seemed to break out of their trance just as the coin hit the velvet, like a victim wakes when the hypnotist snaps his fingers.
They looked around and at the preacher as he just looked up at the benefactor to thank him.
The bums reached down and started to steal the money. I was about to step up when the preacher kicked out his foot and connected with the head of one of the hobos.
The hobo yelped and cried out and the other two ran like school girls.
The money still in the case and the smelly hobos gone he turned his attention to me.

Deu 32:29
I wish that they were wise and could understand this, and that they could comprehend what will happen to them."

Deu 32:30
How can one man chase a thousand of them and two pursue ten thousand; unless their Rock had delivered them up, and the Lord had handed them over?

He looked at me and said, "You there, are you not going to pay your tithe?"
I stepped closer and said "Why tithe to your case when I have a whole flock that tithes to me?"
Tell me the name of the anti-Christ and I shall help your cause.
As I got close for a real conversation I realized I did not want to get too close.
He is an alien from space and he hides in the capitol building, protected by the government.
Shit I thought he had something there for a minute.

Deu 32:31
For our enemies' rock is not like our Rock, as even our enemies concede.

Deu 32:32
For their vine is from the stock of Sodom, and from the fields of Gomorrah. Their grapes contain venom, their clusters of grapes are bitter.

He smelled of thunderbird and rotten teeth. He had fleas in his beard.
He grabbed me and told me I was going to hell.
I laughed and said no I am not going to hell and that you sir are crazy and smelly. Get away from me.

Deu 32:33
Their wine is snakes' poison, the deadly venom of cobras.

Deu 32:34
"Is this not stored up with me?" says the Lord "Is it not sealed up in my storehouses?

He said that I was a sinner and that I had to repent on the evilness of my ways.
I smacked him flat upside the head with my pimp hand and bible.
He staggered and fell to his knees.
I did not see it but he reached into his waist band and pulled out a knife and charged me.

Deu 32:35
I will get revenge and pay them back at the time their foot slips; for the day of their disaster is near, and the impending judgment is rushing upon them!"

Deu 32:36
The Lord will judge his people, and will change his plans concerning his servants; when he sees that their power has disappeared, and that no one is left, whether confined or set free.

My reaction when I saw the silver glint in his hand was to bring up my bible in two hands. Just in time the bible intercepted the blade and flesh connection and the blade plunged all the way through the book and stopped with 1 inch of the Pakistani metal tip sticking out.
I looked and saw that this fuck had ruined another bible. He had cut the word of the lord while trying to cut the speaker of the lord's word.

Deu 32:37
He will say, "Where are their gods, the rock in whom they sought security,

Deu 32:38
who ate the best of their sacrifices, and drank the wine of their drink offerings? Let them rise and help you; let them be your refuge!

I twisted the good book and the knife came free of his hand. I brought my right back across his face and he cried out in pain.
I pulled the knife from the bible and let it fall to the ground and I began to beat the preacher on top of the head with the spine of my King James Bible.
Over and over I brought the good word down upon his head screaming for him to repent and pray for salvation. He dropped to his knees some more and fell silent.
I began to kick him in the ribs until I heard on crack.
The man was not going to give in.
Finally as my foot began to hurt he said oh lord why, why have you forsaken me?
I said that is the wrong god you are worshiping, a lesser lord and cheap imitation of the true lord our god.
You must now see the real god and I lift him to his feet. He reached out and grabbed my hand.
And bit me!
The fucker bit me.
Man I must have beat on his ass for another 10 minutes before he began to plead for the lord to save him.
My arms were tired

Isa 57:10
Because of the long distance you must travel, you get tired, but you do not say, 'I give up.' You get renewed energy, so you don't collapse.

But they were not too tired to take him up into my arms and welcome him to the lord's light, the lord's love.
He wept on my shoulder and wailed that he was not worthy of the love that was bestowed upon him for he had worshiped the wrong gods. He had listened to prophesies of the weaker gods and now realized that he had been preaching the wrong words to the people everyday at lunch.
He realized the error of his ways and immediately began to plan his atonement.
he was to begin telling everyone the truth. He was going to tell everyone the lord that he saw and that the end times are not the concern and that the righteous must know the true and stronger god that he has now found.
He was to tell every one of the prophet that was Sleestaxx and the great brutal teachings that I bestowed upon him.
He was going to tell everyone that I have a message for everyone that everyone must see me.
I have a message for all of humanity.
You are all evil. God knows you are evil. You know you are evil. You will always be evil if you do not listen to the messages that I bring to you. The lord has chosen me to communicate the message. He has heaped upon my shoulders the most laborious and heaviest of burdens. That is the burden of saving your evil souls. It is my responsibility to bring you all out of the darkness. Protect you from evil and lead you to greener pastures.
And you all just do not help. You do not listen. You think that Thursdays and Sundays are all you have to do. But you need to help me help you. I need you all evangelize. if you can not evangelize then I need you to point them to me. Promote me. Buy my book for yourself and a friend. Tell everyone you meet to get in the game, step up to the plate, play to win.
The Doughnuts and coffee are courtesy of the old ladies that sit around the chapel all week ling to listen to the gossip and the prayers of the rest of you.
Kill each other in the parking lot for all I care because you all act like fucking children at this time of the day.
Fuck off and amen.




Currently reading


Like A Monkey With A Handgun
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx
Release date: By 3 December, 2007

Our World Is Going To Hell In A Hand Basket By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

The Basket Is Labeled MTV



Our society is under siege. Our defenses are tuned to the wrong enemy. While we fight for our country and our security and what we hold near and dear our future is being attacked.
The enemy is right inside of our houses and the center point of many of our lives.
I am talking about the television and the content that is on the television. Our future is our children and they are under attack every minute of every day while they are watching television. I see it everyday when I am plagued with nightmares. I see it everyday when I turn on the television just to get the news of the day and the weather.
I see it when I see 12 year old girls dressed like hookers and whores and the boys dressed like they live in the ghetto. Mind you these clothes look like ghetto but they are clean and expensive name brands but none the less they wear the shit baggy and loose and they strut like the shit heads that rap.
The kids do nothing but look for things that make them happy. The kids today think they are the most important thing and their happiness is more important.

2Ti 3:4
treacherous, reckless, conceited, loving pleasure rather than loving God.

Eze 11:2
The Lord said to me, “Son of man, these are the men who plot evil and give wicked advice in this city.

I would like to talk about the sinners at MTV. The pretentious sinners of MTV. The perpetrators of sin propaganda and brainwashers of our youth. The world is going to hell in a hand basket and the basket is labeled MTV. MTV displays near nudity and alternative life styles. As if these are normal things in the world. The broadcast station purports that loose sexual morals are cool, hip, and that only the smart cool kids are having sex. And to be right in the universe and to be accepted is to have sex with as many people as possible and as often as you can.

Jer 23:14
But I see the prophets of Jerusalem doing something just as shocking. They are unfaithful to me and continually prophesy lies. So they give encouragement to people who are doing evil, with the result that they do not stop their evildoing. I consider all of them as bad as the people of Sodom and the citizens of Jerusalem as bad as the people of Gomorrah.

MTV and the rest of television content for that matter is teaching every one of our young people, you know the ones that will be in charge of our world very shortly, that everyone is gay and everyone wants to be gay and that being gay is ok.

1Co 6:9
Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived! The sexually immoral, idolaters, adulterers, passive homosexual partners, practicing homosexuals,


They say that you should live in a strange city, with very dysfunctional people, and have your dysfunctional life and personal drama splayed out for the world to see. You should have sex with you house mates and that is ok. you should drink to the point of poisoning and throw up and then fight with your housemates. MTV shows videos that purports that is cool to be a pimp or a girl with loose morals. It is the way of the world to be a criminal and carry a gun.

1Ti 1:10
sexually immoral people, practicing homosexuals, kidnappers, liars, perjurers – in fact, for any who live contrary to sound teaching.

Why just last week I saw a teenager in my neighborhood walking the street like he was a gangster in the city. He had a paper bag in his hand and this bag was not like a bag he had just got from shopping at the gas station, this bag was well worn and the object inside was too small to be a porno mag like when I was young.
I knew where he lived as I had cut his lawn for many summers and watched this spoiled middle class punk grow up. I had spoken to father and mother many times. I knew they worked hard to keep their young from being exposed to bad influences.
I stopped got out of my truck. I asked him what was in the bag and where did he live.
Yes I was confronting a middle class gangster wanna be.
He took the posture of a rap singer posing for a CD cover.
He told me "That is none of your business old man". "I do not have to tell you anything."
I stepped to him and I said, “Son tell me what you are doing on this middle class street pretending to be a gang member.”
“I ain't pretending you old fart.”

Ecc 7:10
Do not say, “Why were the old days better than these days?” for it is not wise to ask that.

“Yeah ok your parents are filing a 1040a with a combined income of 80k or better and you want to tell me know about oppression and being poor?"
“Just tell me you ain't got a gun in bag and I will not tell your daddy what a moron you are.”
He gets very agitated and says "you think I got a gun in here man? is that it? Well you better step before I put you under."
I stepped closer
I was now in striking distance
I reached out, and bitch slapped his ass and he staggers back. I do not think he has ever been hit in his life. he just stood there and looked at me in total shock. Trying to comprehend the last moment.

Num 22:29
And Balaam said to the donkey, “You have made me look stupid; I wish there were a sword in my hand, for I would kill you right now.”

I reached down took the bag from him.
Yeah there was the .38 pistol fully loaded. This stupid middle class spoiled punk was holding a gun in a bag on a quiet suburban street.
I smacked him again "What are you doing? Are you protecting your turf from the Chinese mafia?? What?” I yelled into his face, “Are you worried that your hoes were going to get the wandering eye?"
“Are you dealing heron, smack, horse, china white and you are worried about some crazy strung out junkie jumping you for your stash??”
I smacked him again and he held his face and began to cry. Clearly this dumb piece of shit had never been hit in his life.
"Go tell your daddy I have his gun and to come see me."
Stupid fucking kids.

Jer 51:17
All idolaters will prove to be stupid and ignorant. Every goldsmith will be disgraced by the idol he made. For the image he forges is merely a sham. There is no breath in any of those idols.

MTV's shows have young adults in various stages of undress touching and gyrating and simulating sex. They have fat over the hill singers stumbling over stage. They have plastic Jews telling stupid moronic jokes to propped up drunken slobs from the entertainment industry.
They portray the life of young Americans as nothing but a fucking party. It is no wonder that foreigners hate us and talk about us like we are idiots. if it is wet stick it in and worry not about any consequences. "Just Do It."
There was no fucking party when I grew up! And I know there was not fucking party when you grew up either.

Neh 6:9
All of them were wanting to scare us, supposing, “Their hands will grow slack from the work, and it won’t get done.” So now, strengthen my hands!

Every real life problem can be distilled and solved in 30 mins from drug addiction to sex addition. It takes a life time to crawl from the gutter to the sidewalk to a house. It takes a life time to realize that your mother does not love you. It takes a life time to come to terms with the evil that has been thrusted on you.
Sometimes it takes longer. There are people that I know from long ago that are still in the mess they call life. It can not be taken care with a few well placed jokes and catch phrases.

Hos 10:13
But you have plowed wickedness; you have reaped injustice; you have eaten the fruit of deception. Because you have depended on your chariots; you have relied on your many warriors.


[Showing my middle finger] FUCK YOU MTV!
[Showing my middle finger] FUCK YOU!

Jer 5:27
Like a cage filled with the birds that have been caught, their houses are filled with the gains of their fraud and deceit. That is how they have gotten so rich and powerful.


[Showing my middle finger] FUCK YOU Entertainment tonight!
[Showing my middle finger] FUCK YOU Music industry!
[Showing my middle finger] FUCK YOU Hollywood
[Showing my middle finger] FUCK YOU Real Life!
Nothing fucking real about that show other than the stupidity and moronic actions of the youth that are being exploited.
MTV reports that everybody is in need of surgical perfection regardless of the danger. That you are not right until you have had half a dozen surgeries to correct the perfection that god made.


2Th 2:10
and with every kind of evil deception directed against those who are perishing, because they found no place in their hearts for the truth so as to be saved.

People die everyday from surgery and everyday someone watches television and decide they could look better if they had surgery. People die everyday pimping, dealing, whoring, and being a gangster but everyday MTV tells our youth that it is cool to do these things
I would like to hear tales of how the dogs of the south and the hounds of hell descended and copulated with the dead bodies of MTV producers, writers and directors.

Jer 22:17
But you are always thinking and looking for ways to increase your wealth by dishonest means. Your eyes and your heart are set on killing some innocent person and committing fraud and oppression.

I would like to see MTV setup up a reality show following a few junkies and whores around the city trying to scrape a living and an existence. Maybe follow a drug dealer to a turf war and watch his body twitch and jerk as his blood ran onto the street.
How about following a couple of runaways and see the twisted ways they are made to keep alive on the street.

Pro 12:24
The diligent person will rule, but the slothful will become a slave.

I want to thank everyone who has helped in the building of the youth center. I want to thank everyone for the wonderful donations to furnish the center. I want to thank the single mothers group for the house cleaning they provide the rectory and the church.
I want to thank the women’s auxiliary for the coffee and donuts that are waiting for us in the foyer.
I would like to thank the choir for the lovely singing they provided today.
And I would like to thank Demarini for the baseball bat sponsorship.
Please honk in the parking lot so that I may test my new bats.


Go in peace and love they neighbor


Like A Monkey With A Handgun
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx
Release date: By 3 December, 2007..

Seven Deadly Sins: Envy By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

Mar 7:22 adultery, greed, evil, deceit, debauchery, envy, slander, pride, and folly.

Today I am going to tell a story and talk about envy.

Jam 3:14 But if you have bitter jealousy and selfishness in your hearts, do not boast and tell lies against the truth.

Envy is like greed as they are the wanton desire for something. Greed is just the desire to have material things, but envy is the desire to have something that someone has because the person feels inadequate without the item.
Wars are started over this and the other sins. One nation looks to the east and sees that his neighbor gets to see the sun before he does and he thinks that makes his neighbor more prosperous and the idiot masses an army and they march east to fight for the rising sun. How fucking retarded is that? The can not own the sun and they will always have someone who sees the sun before they do.
Some countries may not go to war but they will artificially drag down the economy of another so that the difference between the companies is not so grand.

Pro 6:18 a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that are swift to run to evil,

The Texas mom who wanted to have her daughter on the cheerleading squad killed the mother of another so that her baby could break an ankle and show her panties to the entire football team and spectators.
Bizarre shit for envy I tell you.

2Co 12:20 For I am afraid that somehow when I come I will not find you what I wish, and you will find me not what you wish. I am afraid that somehow there may be quarreling, jealousy, intense anger, selfish ambition, slander, gossip, arrogance, and disorder.

Families are torn asunder over envy.
Someone came to me last month and told me "my family wants to keep up with the neighbors. They ridicule me and say that I am a failure because I can not proived liek their friends do"
How said is that?? I have had that family in for special counseling sessions and trust me when I tell you that the worst to convert was the daughter. She needed the certain cell phone and the certain car and the certain clothing label.
In the end I told that church member to shave the daughter's head. Her envious ways would change as she would just desire a normal hair cut. And every time she said I need what so-in-so has to beat her and shave her head.
I need not name any names but we can just look around and see whom I speak of. Hey baby how are you today.

Pro 6:19 a false witness who pours out lies,

The thugs on the street want to keep up with the famous rappers that came from good homes but pretend to be from crime.
They are envious of the pretend life of money women and things that are portrayed on television in the rap videos. They do not understand that these things are just things and mostly things that are rented for the production of the movie. The big busted girls in bikinis are actresses paid to be in the video. None of the players in the video knew each other the day before the shooting started.

Lucifer's desire to be like god, and to control humans is what got his ass kicked out of heaven. Lucifer was envious of gods power and tried top usurp it. God got sick of Lucifer’s shit and cast him down from heaven.

In sports we see it all time Bond's desire to be like the other baseball greats. Caused him to maybe partake of some synthetic body modifications so that he could be like the greats and now he may end in the book as the greatest failure of all. Anything he accomplishes now is diminished by the perception that he cheated. What a dumb twit. But well there is another example of how stupid one becomes when gripped by the sinful emotion of jealousy.

At work we all know the guy that is jealous of the other successful employee and in his envious ways he sabotages the work of the other. This not only hurts the company but also both of the employees.

Another church was envious of our church and caused the construction of the main hall to stop. They sent parishners in the night to strip parts off equipment and to cause bank and government approvals to slow. One parishners was caught redoing work so that the building inspection would fail or the church would collapse.
I finally confronted the priest and we hashed out the problem and he found that he was infected with the sin of envy and he was very apologetic.
He then talked his parishners in assisting our contractor in any capacity possible.

Pro 49:18 He pronounces this blessing on himself while he is alive: “May men praise you, for you have done well!”

We as older folk need to be sure that our envy-ness of the young does not precipitate in discrimination and wrongful judging of the youth. Because the youth is young and pretty does not mean that they are better than us the older folk. We are older and smarter and wiser as we have made the mistakes and the youth do not listen to our wisdom. Let us sit back and enjoy the fact we have more to offer than the youth. The youth should be envious of us and that is the truth.

Gal 5:20 idolatry, sorcery, hostilities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish rivalries, dissensions, factions,

Women and men are envious of each other. Men envious that women are perceived as having an easier time in life as they are women and they have the pooty but the truth is that because they have the pooty and most men are envious they have a harder time.
Women are envious of a man's penis. The penis, no matter how ugly it is a sign of strength and power. The penis looks like a sword for a reason. Gods wanted men to be strong and in control of the environment.
But even though women are not expected to be fighter’s and to go to war they are still envious of the penis.
I was umpiring a softball game one summer night and there was a female coach on a team and you could tell that she did not like men. Her attitude was all about you disgust me, you are invading what I perceive to be a girl’s sport and no men should be allowed to participate.
Well during the game there was a banger on third. My female partner rings the player out. I saw the whole play my angle was no better and no worse than anybody else’s and I thought good call. I also thought man I am glad I did not have to make that call because holy shit there is going to be a pissed off coach no matter how the call goes.
The male coach comes out and approaches me.

Gal 5:26 Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, being jealous of one another.

Did you see the call? What the hell is she thinking? That runner was safe by a mile. Aren’t you going to do something?
Yes coach I am. I am going to tell you to talk to the official that made the call AFTER you ask for time and she gives you time. Until then get back to your dugout.
What?
Yes now either turn to go back to the dug out or turn to leave the field you have two places to go.
He went to the dug asked for time I looked to my partner she said "time".
The coach now walks all the way to the umpire and starts to yell. My partner says "coach you need to stop yelling".
The coach still yells.
She turns and starts to walk away.
This is my queue to step up and make the coach leave. He did not proceed correctly. And now he was dangerously in bad territory.
I get about half the distance and he sees me and he turns and starts to his dugout and now the female coach says "I knew he did not have the balls to keep going".
Holy shit the other coach turned and charges the female coach. He comes up and stops short in her face and starts to yell about how she needs to mind her own business and how all the dykes stick together.
At that the female coach reaches up and pokes him in the eye with her fist. And before the coach can get his hand to his eye, a knee is jammed into his crotch and he drops.

Gal 5:21 envying, murder, drunkenness, carousing, and similar things. I am warning you, as I had warned you before: Those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God!

I get there and step in between the two my partner bends to the coach to help him up and as he is getting up my partner whispers that’s what you get for having a prick you dick!
I thought I was going to burst.
The coach looked at me and asked, "Did you hear that?"
Yeah I heard her ask if you were ok which I thought was very nice of her since you were so rude.
Now get off the field or forfeit
And I turned to the female coach and she just nodded because she knew that she was gone also.
We finished a 4 ITB game and the coaches stood next one another in the parking lot watching the game.
The point is the demon Leviathan will sweep in fast and make you stupid before you know it and then holy crap you are stuck with a sack of shit and a stupid look.
The little league has asked me to tell every one that they are having their annual umpire clinic this January and February and anybody wanting to umpire and maybe make a little extra cash should contact them for specific dates.
I would also like t thank all of the regular attendees and subscribers.
I also would like to mention that my second book “With A Mouth Full Of Razorblades” is to be released January 15th in three languages English, German, and French. As always purchases through my Blog will get the book delivered directly from me with an autograph saying just about anything you want.
There are a few copies of “Like A Monkey With A Handgun” left and the same goes for purchases through the Blog.
Cake and coffee is in the foyer. Go get some! And go in peace!

Satan Came to my door today

I answered the door and there was Satan. He wanted to talk to the lady of the house about her choice of laundry detergent.
I told him that she was not home and that he should not come back.
He then stated that the laminated card clipped to his breast pocket allowed him the opportunity to harass and manipulate the fine citizens of my

neighborhood.
I said really? Hold on one second fucktard.
and I went to the closet to get my chainsaw, (What where do you keep yours?)
I began to step in his direction and told him that this two stroke, 5 horse power cutting device allows me the oppurtunity to cut his pecker off and that I

was going to put his cut off pecker in my family bible.

Whoa hold on Mr. Sleestaxx.
That is Reverend To you Satan.
OK Rev. But I still need to talk to your wife.
No sir you need to step the fuck off my porch before I cut your penis off with this here chainsaw.
Look Rev. I am just trying to sell some cleaner door to door
I too sell cleaners. I sell cleaners for the soul. I clean sins from souls.
I beat the dirt from the minds of the sinners and mortals of this earth. and I do not need any of what you are selling Satan now go.
Satan began to cry. He complained that he was just missed understood and that he was just being manitpulated by god and that the good lord was using him as

a scape goat for all the bad things in life.
I said cry me a river bitch and I sent him next door and told him talk to my neighbor Henry Rollins.
Henry is a fucker. and Satan will not see it coming!

My Book Is Now Published and For Sale



Like A Monkey With A Handgun
by Rev. J. Sleestaxx

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Behold! I Have Come To Kick Your Ass! By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

John 1:1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was fully God. 1:2 The Word was with God in the beginning. 1:3 All things were created by him, and apart from him not one thing was created that has been created. 1:4 In him was life, and the life was the light of mankind. 1:5 And the light shines on in the darkness, but the darkness has not mastered it.

A year ago I was asked to step into this church and speak. The congregation was 20 at most and they were mostly older women and a old man or two that has since passed on.
I began my first sermon using the sermon from John Edwards "Sinners in the hands of an angry god".
I spoke with passion and fervor. I woke some people up in the middle when I began to stomp and bang when I wanted to make a point.
Then the word started to spread. I began to tell about how I knew what it was like in the real world and the tests that put to you all. I spoke about how god did not want you all to be weak he wanted you to stand up and be men or women, but regardless stand up for yourselves. Take what is yours be assertive because the world is changing.
I had an old woman or two tell me that they were scared to leave their house because of the drug dealers. But now they were more scared of me and not showing up then they were of the thugs on their street.

John 1:6 A man came, sent from God, whose name was John. 1:7 He came as a witness to testify about the light, so that everyone might believe through him. 1:8 He himself was not the light, but he came to testify about the light. 1:9 The true light, who gives light to everyone, was coming into the world. 1:10 He was in the world, and the world was created by him, but the world did not recognize him. 1:11 He came to what was his own, but his own people did not receive him. 1:12 But to all who have received him – those who believe in his name – he has given the right to become God’s children 1:13 – children not born by human parents or by human desire or a husband’s decision, but by God.

I went to their houses and I beat the pimps and the drug dealers into believing they were going to hell. They began to come to church and the church helped them to find honest work. The church helped when the church needed to and when the church could.
The women began to tell of how much nicer the neighborhoods became when the lord took the evil off the street.
The evil that did not see the light did not stay around very long.
I heard one say they had never seen a man be so lucky that did not carry a gun.

Deu 32:26
“I said, ‘I want to cut them in pieces. I want to make people forget they ever existed.

Deu 32:27
But I fear the reaction of their enemies, for their adversaries would misunderstand and say, “Our power is great, and the Lord has not done all this!”’

Deu 32:28
They are a nation devoid of wisdom, and there is no understanding among them.

Deu 32:29
I wish that they were wise and could understand this, and that they could comprehend what will happen to them.”

Rodney "The Rod" Smith
You all remember him right??
Yeah he was the one that came to church to challenge me and he brought that Mac 10.
Do you all remember how he began to fire at me during one of my sermons and how every single bullet just disappeared the moment it left the barrel?

Deu 32:30
How can one man chase a thousand of them, and two pursue ten thousand; unless their Rock had delivered them up, and the Lord had handed them over?

Deu 32:31
For our enemies’ rock is not like our Rock, as even our enemies concede.

Do you remember the fear in his eyes when realized that the bullets were disappearing and I was coming down from the dais toward him? His posse began to shoot too and they just made noise as their bullets vaporized.
Man that was classic, he stood there locked kneed staring at me as the bullets never touched me.
And when I struck the gun from his hand with my bible, the gun made of hardened steel and carbon fiber, shattered into a million pieces.
And then I brought the bible down on his head and he fell back wailing in tongues.
His boys all fell to their knees screaming ‘how they were sorry and that’ “oh please god forgive us.”
Our congregation double that day and has increased by 10 people every Sunday since.
The crime rate in the neighbor hood has dropped and the word on the street is that god is looking over this 40 block area himself.

Deu 32:32
For their vine is from the stock of Sodom, and from the fields of Gomorrah. Their grapes contain venom, their clusters of grapes are bitter.

Deu 32:33
Their wine is snakes’ poison, the deadly venom of cobras.

Deu 32:34
“Is this not stored up with me?” says the Lord, “Is it not sealed up in my storehouses?

These thugs, pimps, and crooked policemen, and players are all worshiping false gods and false idols. They have not seen what real power can do. they can not see the lord for they are too blinded by the lies and deceit that is the drugs they do and the money they hoard.
They are too busy worrying about how to hold their place and get more, then to see the damage they are causing to the neighborhood.
The whores all believe they are innocents and their crime is a victimless crime but they do not see the rage that is god’s anger from their misdeeds. The thugs, crooked cops and Politian’s all want to be in power. They fight and kill and cheat and rob to gain power but only god can give them true power.
Just as god gave me the power walk through Rodney's bullets he gives you all the power to stand up for what is yours.
Just as he gave me the power to thump the word of god into the two cops that ran the drug rings right in front of the church. He gives you al the power to say no to the heathens that want to take what is yours away from you.
Those cops were dealing drugs right out of their squad car.
Those two tried to arrest me when I beat their runner with my bible when I caught him stealing from the basket that one Sunday.

Yeah DO NOT FUCKING STEAL FROM THE CHURCH AS I WILL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU!
They rolled up on me began to push me around and say they were going have to take me down town for questioning. I beat the shit out of them, before they could even bring out their taser. They said they were sorry and that they would no longer be dealing drugs.
I even made them clean up their own blood.
The lord wants you to stand up for yourself. Take what is yours, do not let some heathen take something from you. Do not let an opportunity pass that you could have thumped some Jesus into some sinner.

Deu 32:35
I will get revenge and pay them back at the time their foot slips; for the day of their disaster is near, and the impending judgment is rushing upon them!”

Deu 32:36
The Lord will judge his people, and will change his plans concerning his servants; when he sees that their power has disappeared, and that no one is left, whether confined or set free.

Deu 32:37
He will say, “Where are their gods, the rock in whom they sought security,

After the beatings ask them where is their god? And why did their god fail them? Tell them that their god is a pussy and their god is no match for your god and that any time anywhere your god will go toe to toe with their fucked up watered down version of a god.
Tell them God kicked Satan’s ass, god kicked your ass. And ask, “Who’s god has the better kung fu bitch?”
Yeah that is right!
Now remember sometimes the beatings must be done a couple times as the poor soul you are saving could be too blinded from the lies and deceit but eventually they will come around and they will see the light that is god's word and god's love.

Deu 32:38
who ate the best of their sacrifices, and drank the wine of their drink offerings? Let them

Deu 6:5
You must love the Lord your God with your whole mind, your whole being, and all your strength. rise and help you; let them be your refuge!

I beat therefore I am. I whip your ass in the name of god. I beat the sinners down and tattoo the word "Holy Bible" into the foreheads of the unwashed and the filthy sinners of our time.
Just as each generation of insect becomes immune to pesticide so does the sinner to god’s word. God’s word needs to be stronger every day. There is no limit to the strength and love that god has for all of his children.
Remember that and you will be better at beating the shit out of and the word into all of the sinners of the world the more you love god and the more you love and stand up for your self.
I believe that if we all bring this to our work and we bring this to the voting booths and we let the godless bastards that are our bosses know that we will no longer be meek and we will no longer be sheep shepherded by wolves. That we will now fight back and take what is ours we will have a better chance of surviving the rough and tough roads that lay ahead.
I hear that some of the married men may be taking the assistance of the single mothers too far. I am sure that this is not the case and I am sure that the married women that think this will realize their mistakes.
But should this rumor turn out to be true believe me there will be some serious ass kicking happening.
The sewing circle is holding crotchet classes fro the teen girls. they say all girls should know how to mend and sew and crotchet before they are to be married. So girls I think that you can give up one night of training to learn a more feminine skill.
I would like to say that the drug tests came back as well as the chromosome tests came back.
It appears that the girls champion is in deed a girl and has been beating the shit out of the boys for many weeks.
But I have it on good authority that this Friday will be the turning point for the boys as they have a secret weapon that has been training in secret and is ready to rumble. Come out Friday to see the boys lose or the boys take back the trophy.
No cookies, no coffee, no fucking dunking donuts, as you all can not behave in the parking lot.
Go home and think of a way to apologize to me and your neighbor.

Amen

My Teeth Are Sharp For A Reason By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

Anti meat eaters
I understand that you may not like the texture of meat. I understand that you may not like the feeling of chewing meat.
But to propagandize the fairness in eating non-human animals is too much!
God gave us all sharp teeth when he designed us.
We are meat eaters it was so divined in the beginning of time and space. From the moment the bacteria evolved into something then into us it was decided that we were to eat meat.
God meant us to be dominating of all the animals that is why he made us in his image

Gen 1:26 Then God said, “Let us make humankind in our image, after our likeness, so they may rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move on the earth.”

Gen 1:27 God created humankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them, male and female he created them.

We are at the top of the food chain. Now I will admit that god's design did not account for fossil fuels and the like but hey at some point the design of the earth will kick in and we will be culled to a more manageable level. There is nothing that we need to do about that. It will take of itself.
But this site irks me.'
They speak of fairness to animas that if you smacked on the head would forget about it two minutes later. They were design to be food for us and the rest of the planet.
Here you go.
If humans eating animals is wrong then why do other animals eat other animals and why is that not wrong.
Simple.
Answer that and I may put my burger down.

Seven Deadly Sins: Lust By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

Today I would like to talk about lust.
Lust is the desire that wells in your soul so fiercely that it pushes the lord from your heart.
Lust is not just sex and sexual relations but also the desire and need to obtain or achieve something.
There are some whose lust is money and material things. Now although they are not thinking of fornicating bodies. They do not spend hours masturbating to images in their heads of hot naked sex. Jerking and rubbing their organs raw thinking of hard nude sweaty bodies, bodies licking and touching, tasting the perspiration and juices from one another in a twisted fleshy pile of carnal knowledge. Heaving and undulating, grinding and panting, slamming one body into another tearing one's soul from the other, screaming god's name and the names of a thousand other lovers as they climax and spill their seed onto one another.

Eze 23:11
“Her sister Oholibah watched this, but she became more corrupt in her lust than her sister
had been, and her acts of prostitution were more numerous than those of her sister.

But those fuckers are weird and twisted. They get off on money, they masturbate to pictures of dead presidents. They sold their soul to Satan so that they could have more material things. These material things and all things of this earth can not be taken into the kingdom of heaven. So they sold their soul for not.
Lust is a desire and the strongest desire is sex. God wanted his children to multiply and dominate the world so he created a strong sex drive.
This desire to have sex is lust. And lustful desires lead you to commit great tragic sins.
Whole operas are based on the twisted desires fueled by lust.
Entire 1 hour and 15 minute porno films are there to entice lustful feelings. Watching these films will cause your skin to inflame and your head drunk with desire. The feelings can become such that the air moving across your sweaty skin can drive you mad.

Eze 23:22
“Therefore, Oholibah, this is what the sovereign Lord says: Look here, I am about to stir
up against you the lovers with whom you were disgusted; I will bring them against you from every side:

Eze 23:36
The Lord said to me: “Son of man, are you willing to pronounce judgment on Oholah and
Oholibah? Then declare to them their abominable deeds!

When we are children our lust appears as a sweet tooth or a habit for junk food. Entire mega corporate empires are built on this lust. They inundate us and our children everyday with advertisements for junk food and candy.
Then when we grow hair and become adolescences and enter puberty we find that certain areas make us happy. Our lust changes to rubbing and touching these areas with other people’s areas.
The desire to rub with another becomes intense and an addiction. We get light headed, we begin to think unclear, and we begin to justify doing wrong things and sinful things to sedate this lust, this demon.

Exo 32:21
Moses said to Aaron, “What did this people do to you, that you have brought on them so
great a sin?”

Exo 32:30
The next day Moses said to the people, “You have committed a very serious sin, but now I will go up to the Lord – perhaps I can make atonement on behalf of your sin.”

Did you know that lust is controlled by a demon? Yes a demon! The demon’s name is Asmodeus. When you become so inflamed, so drunk with desire, you allow Asmodeus and opportunity to enter your body.
When Asmodeus enters you are no longer in control. You are now at the mercy of Satan’s harbingers of evil. Many of the children in today’s world have born because of the control of Asmodeus.
You girls here today need to watch for Asmodeus.

Exo 20:14
You shall not commit adultery.

You boys need to say no to Asmodeus.

Gen 39:10
Even though she continued to speak to Joseph day after day, he did not respond to her invitation to have sex with her.

You teenagers parking in cars need to not park in such private areas as that leaves an opportunity for Asmodeus to enter your vehicle and then you have sex!

Eze 23:8
She did not abandon the prostitution she had practiced in Egypt; for in her youth men had sex with her, fondled her virgin breasts, and ravished her.

You all are hot and dripping in sweat sex. Undulating and pressing sliding on the vinyl backseat sex. Thumping and bumping breathless panting wet sex. Grinding and pulsing nails racked across the back sex. In and out, teeth biting shoulders sex. Up and down fingers fumbling dark areas sex. Pelvic grinding pelvic like one huge fuck machine in the back seat of your daddy’s car. The two of you humping like animals with the windows fogged and the radio blaring Iron Butterfly’s “Ina-goda-da-vida”.

Col 3:5 So put to death whatever in your nature belongs to the earth: sexual immorality, impurity, shameful passion, evil desire, and greed which is idolatry.

Come to confession and confess your sins. Tell me of your sins and we will work to have you repent and have the darkness on your soul absolved.
Come to confession and tell me of you transgressions and we will work to keep Asmodeus at bay.

Exo 32:32
But now, if you will forgive their sin…, but if not, wipe me out from your book that you
have written.”

Do not let the sin of lust seal your fate. Do not get thrown into the lake of fire. For the burn you will feel from the lake will be mightier and more painful that the burn lust puts on your flesh. These lustful thoughts and feelings can be stopped. You can beat Asmodeus, you can whoop Satan’s ass just as I do everyday. But the first step is to get control of your head, your heart, and happy places.

Exo 32:34
So now go, lead the people to the place I have spoken to you about. See, my angel will go before you. But on the day that I punish, I will indeed punish them for their sin.”

There is time! [Bang On The Podium]
Now today! [Bang On The Podium]
Right this very moment stand and say “No I will not let my lust get the better of me.”
[Bang On The Podium] DO IT NOW!!!
I want every one of you all standing right now to see me, TODAY, and tell me of every moment that lust has been in control of your decisions and in control of your life. We will go over every detail and work through this together.

Rom 13:13
Let us live decently as in the daytime, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in discord and jealousy.

I do not care how vile, or how hot, or how perverted your tales are. We will work this out. We may have to meet more than once if your tales are long or many. But we will do this and we will get to the end. We will get relief from Asmodeus. We will vanquish the lust demon together. You do not have to do this alone.

Gen 18:20
So the Lord said, “The outcry against Sodom and Gomorrah is so great and their sin so
blatant

You know which one of you needs to stand this moment. You know you have been lustful and you have been rubbing your body with another.
Even you who has been rubbing yourself in the dark under the covers, head back silently screaming with ecstasy. Your fingers wrinkled from the wetness of you perspiration and spit. Rubbing and sliding over the same nervous areas that excite you. Up and down biting your lip as you think those evil thoughts. Gasping and panting while you play those hot images in the porno theatre of your mind.

Deu 13:6
Suppose your own full brother, your son, your daughter, your beloved wife, or your
closest friend should seduce you secretly and encourage you to go and serve other gods that neither you nor your ancestors have previously known,

Torturing that spot with little slippery circles while run scenarios of hot flesh rubbing yours. You think of the taste of flesh in your mouth. You recall the tastes of your salty lovers skin on your tongue. Like your mind recalls the images of the last time your failed to restrain yourself and how the sliding of their flesh on yours raised the hairs on your neck. Your fingers move faster as the images are played faster. Your breath quickens and you kick the covers off because the heat in the sheets is too much and your skin is aflame with desire for relief. Relief is coming, you know it is coming, but you want to wait just a little longer as your brain boil with images of naked people melting into more naked people. Your lust is mounting and you can no longer hold the tide. Your body shakes as waves of lustful pleasure roll over you.
Yeah you know who you are. You too need to come see me. We need to talk.

Exo 32:30
The next day Moses said to the people, “You have committed a very serious sin, but now I will go up to the Lord – perhaps I can make atonement on behalf of your sin.”

I want you all to think about how any times you invite Asmodeus into your lives. How many times does the television invite Asmodeus into your lives? What foods and what images are the ones that trigger the lustful thoughts. I know of a man that literately looses all control when he sees his wife vacuum. Seems simple enough but think about how many days there are and how many rooms there are in a house. Now think about how many times Asmodeus can get his wife to vacuum. Yeah that is what I am talking about. Asmodeus is a powerful demon but I know with confession and counseling we can turn this demon back and send him back to hell!

Gen 20:9
Abimelech summoned Abraham and said to him, “What have you done to us? What sin did I commit against you that would cause you to bring such great guilt on me and my kingdom? You have done things to me that should not be done!”

I am here to hear your sins. I am here to counsel your transgressions. I am here.
The teen center is near completion but Satan himself must have a hold on the contractor because that fucker has held up construct for the past two weeks. I would like the knights and the men under 30 to go visit this shit head at the construction shack tomorrow morning. Now I am not saying that you should beat the shit out of him but I think that if he knew the force I command beside god’s he may step up the pace.
Now let us turn to our neighbor and shake their hand. Tell them that you are not worthy to be nest to them because you are going to go out into the parking lot and act the ass.

Amen

Panhandling the lord By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

I was in the corner store to buy some beer and chips. While I was in the store a bum had walked in. The bum looked at me and said hey father help brother out. I looked him in the eye and “If I was your father I could not be your brother unless I had incestuous relations with my mother"

Deu 27:22
‘Cursed is the one who has sexual relations with his sister, the daughter of either his father or mother.’ Then all the people will say, ‘Amen!’

There are many of you all that know that just could not be possible given the ill will and hatred that my mother brings out
No no padre that is not what I meant.
Hey you get out of my store. The clerk jabbered at the bum I told you to stay away. You have no money and you are just looking to steal from me.
I looked at the bum and I asked, “Is that true?”
Do you steal from this man??
The bum looked at me with embarrassment and nodded.

Jer 7:9
You steal. You murder. You commit adultery. You lie when you swear on oath. You sacrifice to the god Baal. You pay allegiance to other gods whom you have not previously known.

Oba 1:5
“If thieves came to rob you during the night, they would steal only as much as they wanted! If grape pickers came to harvest your vineyards, they would leave some behind for the poor! But you will be totally destroyed!

“Sir do not steal from this man any more. Are you a citizen of this country??”
He nodded
I said, “Then good come by the church tonight and every night for the next week and we will feed you.”
“But father it is not food or shelter that I steal it is liquor.

Hos 4:18
They consume their alcohol, then engage in cult prostitution; they dearly love their shameful behavior.

“Sir I can not help you with your liquor problem. Only you and god can conquer.
You have to want to quit to quit.”
He straightened up and began yell at me about how he was a vet and how he served our country and bla bla bla.
I hit him in the eye and he stopped. He stepped to me and I hit him again.
Abdul began to yell and scream, “No John do not do this in here again.”
The other people looked at the clerk and then looked at me.
The bum stepped up and I clocked him so hard he fell back. I stepped up and thumped him again with the spine of my bible across the bridge of his nose he fell out the doors and the clerk was just yelling and yelling.
The lady at the counter to buy the lotto tickets started screaming for Abdul to make a call to the police and he looked at her then me and just put up his hands.
The lady grabbed her cell and I leapt back at her, took the phone and said, “There is no need for the police as I am a man of the cloth and I answer to a higher law that what the donut moochers represent.”

Exo 24:12
1 The Lord said to Moses, “Come up to me to the mountain and remain there, and I will give you the stone tablets with the law and the commandments that I have written, so that you may teach them.”

She looked at me and the will of god just washed over her and she wet herself right there.
I turned back the vagabond and he was just starting to come around and walk to the door. I kicked the doors with such force that the swung wide into the hobo's face and the glass shattered
The bum began to cry and whimper but not in an apologetic way just a frustrated little kid way.
“Sir, do you repent and ask the lord to fill your heart with his love and to take the desire to drink away from you?”
“Why are you hitting me?”
And I brought the bible down on his head.
“Sir, do you not see the errors of your ways and the path to the gift of everlasting life? are you not at the cross roads yet?”
“I just wanted some money for a bottle of wine.”
“No sir that is not the way to go and I brought my foot to his thigh.”

Eze 26:10
He will cover you with the dust kicked up by his many horses. Your walls will shake from the noise of the horsemen, wheels, and chariots when he enters your gates like those who invade through a city’s broken walls.

“He yelped and asked for a drink.”
There was a young man also in the store and he came out and placed his hand on my shoulder.
“Reverend you need to stop.”
“Young man if you know anything about how the real world works, you know that this man is in trouble and I am trying to reach him.”

Exo 7:4
Pharaoh will not listen to you. I will reach into Egypt and bring out my regiments, my people the Israelites, from the land of Egypt with great acts of judgment.

Deu 4:28
There you will worship gods made by human hands – wood and stone that can neither see, hear, eat, nor smell.

“His god is his drink. It is the drink that he worships and it is a false idol that he needs to let look away from.”
“He must,” and I kicked him two more times, but he just sat there like a child throwing a fit. “Give up the drink” I told the young man and I brought the bible down on the top of his head.

Deu 5:27
You go near so that you can hear everything the Lord our God is saying and then you can tell us whatever he says to you; then we will pay attention and do it.”

“I must help him now” and the you man grabbed my arm I brought the bible spine across his nose and he stepped back.
The hobo was crying now and asking for god to help him
You see I said loudly he is beginning to see the path to righteousness.
“Man are you willing to give up the drink and accept the churches help?”
“Yes father yes please do not beat me anymore.”

Deu 13:17
You must not take for yourself anything that has been placed under judgment. Then the Lord will relent from his intense anger, show you compassion, have mercy on you, and multiply you as he promised your ancestors.

Jer 12:15
But after I have uprooted the people of those nations, I will relent and have pity on them. I will restore the people of each of those nations to their own lands and to their own country.

“Then get thee to the church down the street and tell them the reverend Sleestaxx sent you. They will take care of you.”
The young man looked horrified at me. He was still holding his nose.
“For a priest you sure are a fucker!”
“What do you mean kid?”
“You did not have to beat that man.”
“No I did”
“He was stealing and he was worshiping the drink and he forgot his way.”
“I had to show him back the right path. I had to get past the drink and the years of self loathing so that he could hear the words of the lord.”

Num 12:6
The Lord said, “Hear now my words: If there is a prophet among you, I the Lord will make myself known to him in a vision; I will speak with him in a dream.

“No you are a bully and you shoved your religion down his throat.”
“No he asked for help.”

Exo 22:23
If you afflict them in any way and they cry to me, I will surely hear their cry,

“I gave it to him. He said help a brother out.”
“That is not what he meant.”
“No that is exactly what he meant. If he wanted what you say he wanted he would have asked you or the nice lady in there instead.”
“The lord put him in the store at that time for him to meet me. The lord has plans for that man. I know because the god speaks to me even now.”

Exo 19:9
The Lord said to Moses, “I am going to come to you in a dense cloud, so that the people may hear when I speak with you and so that they will always believe in you.” And Moses told the words of the people to the Lord.

“No you are wrong.”
“Ok young man, are you asking for the lord to talk to you also?”
“Oh like you could get me to see your god.”
“I brought the bible down on the top of his young head.”
“He is your god too young man do you not hear and see him yet?”
“What the fuck?”
“Wrong answer” and I brought the bible down again and he dropped to his knees and began to cover up.

Zec 3:5
Then I spoke up, “Let a clean turban be put on his head.” So they put a clean turban on his head and clothed him, while the angel of the Lord stood nearby.

I brought the bible down again and he cried out "oh my god" "Oh my god"
“There you are beginning to see now aren't you punk.”
And I began to just drop the bible down on his head over and over again.
He asked me to stop and I did.
There son, do you see the light?
“Yes father I do see.” He sobbed, “How could I have missed this for so long?”
“The lord has us out here for a reason.”

Mat 10:8
Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse lepers, cast out demons. Freely you received, freely give.

“I will see you in church on Sunday young man.”
“Yes father, you will.”
“On Thursday you can try to have a rematch you want.”
“Will you be using the bible?”
“No just the boxing gloves”
“Then it is a date old man.”
I helped him to his feet. And I already showed him the way.
I went back to the store where the older lady was standing there with her mouth open.
“Ma'am do you know the lord?”
She nodded and I gave back her cell phone.
She left and I looked to Abdul.
“John, what about my door? It is broken.”
“Abdul you know I will fix the door I have always fixed the door in past right?”
“Yes.”
“John your-no er ah.... god is very powerful, isn't he?”
“Abdul I know you do not believe in the same messiah. But until you ask for help in finding the way I can not help you. You may find the way on another path that does not need my counsel.”
“Abdul call the glass people and tell them to bill the church they know the routine and so do you. I am tired and I want to go home.”

Deu 25:18
How they met you along the way and cut off all your stragglers in the rear of the march when you were exhausted and tired; they were unafraid of God.

2Sa 17:29
Honey, curds, flocks, and cheese. For they said, “The people are no doubt hungry, tired, and thirsty there in the desert.”

“Everyone I would like you all too welcome Scott and Patrick.”
“Come on let have a big hello and round of applause. I want them to feel welcomed and at home.”
Scott will be helping the single mothers group with their chores and Patrick will be in need of constant counseling until he is dry and confident.
The parking lot was a joy to see last weekend every one taking their time to leave and not honking or yelling. There were no accidents.
Please let us do that again this weekend and every week end from now one.
I will have Patrick work the parking lot detail. he will have the same authority as me and the same baseball bat.
Please stop in the foyer for coffee and cookies. Please congratulate the girls champion again and make sure to stop by the boys and point and laugh as they lost again last Friday night.
I understand it was close....NOT....
Two rounds and the boys' champion taps out. What is that?

Keep your pimp hand strong and go in peace.

Amen

Criminals and molesters listen to me By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

Criminals and molesters listen to me

By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

My friends and family that are here today and the ones that could not make it today due to the various commitments that arise through out the week are not whom I speak of today when I say I say I hate people. I hate you humans. I would rather drift and sink in a sea of maggots and leeches that climb onto a piece of driftwood with any of the human race.
There are some of you that know some of my story and about how I became who I am. I have told stories when needed for imagery about some of my life to this point in time.
But trust me when I say I know human suffering and I know human predators and I know the human race is diseased with fucking scum.

Hos 9:14
Give them, O Lord – what will you give them? Give them wombs that miscarry, and breasts that cannot nurse!

Lam 3:65
Give them a distraught heart; may your curse be on them!

I listened to a story about a school teacher molesting little girls in school. Why? Why do we have to prolong this humans existence any long than necessary.
There is enough stories that match and from many different girls over the course of some two years. Let us just fuck have a lottery on how this shit fuck dies.
No I do not want to waste the care and feeding of this human. If this was an animal that got loose and was going down the street biting people then the cops
Would block off the street and shoot it! There is nothing different from us and the animals other that our thumbs.

Jer 17:10
I, the Lord, probe into people’s minds. I examine people’s hearts. I deal with each person according to how he has behaved. I give them what they deserve based on what they have done.

Luk 18:8
I tell you, he will give them justice speedily. Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?”

I see the surveillance video of some punk ass freak taking pictures up a 13 year old skirt. What the hell is wrong with him? 13 years old........ jesus H christ!
That mother fucker should find himself in my neighborhood. In my church I would take care of him and the fucker in the school. I would wash their sins with their blood. They would leak red life liquid from their eyes and noses and ears from teh baptism I would administer.
The fuckers would be screaming for salvation and crying to their punk ass god until heir punk ass god did not deliver them and then they would cry to my god for forgiveness and my lord would not deliver them after a pound was extracted and spilled on the mat. My god would make them pay like the evil twisted sinners they are.

Num 5:18
Then the priest will have the woman stand before the Lord, uncover the woman’s head, and put the grain offering for remembering in her hands, which is the grain offering of suspicion. The priest will hold in his hand the bitter water that brings a curse.

These fuckers need to be held up by their toes and flayed by the cat o nine tails just as jesus was. They need to be beaten raw and then salt poured into their wounds to stop the blood flow and the given some more beatings. I want these fuckers in society to suffer as the kids that are abused suffer I want the abusers to know what suffering is. I want them to cry every night and I want them to doubt their validity and their purpose in life. They should know the smell of salesman crotch. They should think that this is the only way to live and then they may begin to understand the hopeless ness of the situation.
They should be left to eat the left overs of strangers and they should be treated like trash.
There should be a day of predator beatings. Once a month the child molesters should be taken out of the prison and put out on the sidewalk once a month for any passerby to beat kick rape and spit on.

Num 5:21
Then the priest will put the woman under the oath of the curse and will say to the her, “The Lord make you an attested curse among your people, if the Lord makes your thigh fall away and your abdomen swell; “your thigh” as a euphemism for the genitals: “cause your genital organs to shrink.”

Man the lord sure had some great curses back then. But see now we are all civilized and have all this technology and all these smarts that we do not need his curses and we should be able to fix these problems our selves we have been shown the way.
But we have some poor child molester’s mother who wants to protect her bay boy and she fights for lesser sentences and easier punishments. The molester's mother has no idea what horrible damage has been done the child of someone else and she does not care and there in lies the problem. She does not care. She did not care when her baby was growing up and so this piece of shit was not brought properly and so he is now a human animal and needs to be put down. The mother that raise that fucking piece of crap should be put down also and any family members two generations up should also be fixed and not allowed to have children they have a defect in their family and the tree should be pruned.
The molesters would think better about molesting if they know they would be put down and their families would be put down also.
Why do we keep doing the same thing over and over again?



Num 5:19
Then the priest will put the woman under oath and say to the her, “If no other man has had sexual relations with you, and if you have not gone astray and become defiled while under your husband’s authority, may you be free from this bitter water that brings a curse.

Num 5:22
and this water that causes the curse will go into your stomach, and make your abdomen swell and your thigh rot.” Then the woman must say, “Amen, amen.”

Num 5:24
He will make the woman drink the bitter water that brings a curse, and the water that brings a curse will enter her to produce bitterness.

While I am on a rant about molesters and their fucked up families let me touch on the subject of thieves.
We all know what happened to the poor bastard I caught breaking into my car. Well he is now been released because there are too many criminals and they needed the space. WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT ABOUT?? just throw some fucking blankets on the floor. They are animals. And put any mother fucker that wants to talk about rights in there with the criminals for a night.
I am sure that any tree hugging, fur kissing, dirt munching druid spent the night with these fuckers would not think they deserved any rights. Just one of those animals would knock out their teeth and toss their salad to prove he was not human and just another fucking animal.
We are too nice to our criminals. We give them too many comforts. The punishment is not nearly as bad as the crime they committed. Because their is always some fuck head saying "oh they are just misunderstood. They just need some help to understand how to so-operate in society." Bull shit! they know how they choose not to.
They want to prey on others. That is how they want to make their way. And we say no no that is not right. Here have a time out. Ok now go out do not do it again.

Num 5:27
When he has made her drink the water, then, if she has defiled herself and behaved unfaithfully toward her husband, the water that brings a curse will enter her to produce bitterness – her abdomen will swell, her thigh will fall away, and the woman will become a curse among her people.

Isa 47:3
Let your private parts be exposed! Your genitals will be on display! I will get revenge; I will not have pity on anyone,”

The punishment should fit the crime. Rapists should be raped daily; murders should be tortured on television daily and then killed. Robbers should be forced to work for government agencies and coaches would be made to umpire.
I want to see these predators, these fucking pussies, these blights on society brought to the level at which they belong and kept there. They do not deserve any special treatment. They do not deserve a jail cell that is comfortable or safe they should be in fear every minute of their lives. They should know the fear and anguish of the people they victimized. They should suffer great deals before the good lord weighs them. They should just be removed from society and fed to pigs.
To my community I would like to thank their wonderful support and encouragement. I would like to thank First Execration Church Of Odium Anathema for receiving me and letting be their Shepard. I believe I have accomplished much and I believe that there is much left to be accomplished. The good lord’s work is never done.
I have been asked to go on a speaking tour. And I have been asked to read sermons at other churches. It appears that my evangelizing has become somewhat of a commodity.
Fear not I will always be your pastor your reverend your light to the good lord. But I will have to defer some Thursdays to Shannon Lark and a couple of the other deacons.
Please go in peace and know that I am in the parking lot with rocks waiting for you bastards to misbehave.

Umpiring and the lord By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

THE FOX AND THE GRAPES By Aesop

A hungry Fox saw some fine bunches of Grapes hanging from a vine that was trained along a high trellis, and did his best to reach them by jumping as high as he could into the air. But it was all in vain, for they were just out of reach: so he gave up trying, and walked away with an air of dignity and unconcern, remarking, "I thought those Grapes were ripe, but I see now they are quite sour."

Our society is falling apart. We are generating legions of whiners and cry babies. Our children are learning that it is better to blame someone for their failures than to accept that some fucking work needs to be done to accomplish anything.

Mark 16:16 The one who believes and is baptized will be saved, but the one who does not believe will be condemned. 16:17 These signs will accompany those who believe: In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new languages; 16:18 they will pick up snakes with their hands, and whatever poison they drink will not harm them; they will place their hands on the sick and they will be well.”

I umpired eleven softball games this weekend. I step onto the field knowing that there will be a sinner that hates me and a coach that loves me. This I know. I will never make a call that both teams will like. From the first outside pitch that I did not see over the plate to the check swing that I called a swing I had this fucking asshole on my back.

Psa 57:4 I am surrounded by lions; I lie down among those who want to devour me; men whose teeth are spears and arrows, whose tongues are a sharp sword.

Rev 9:8 They had hair like women’s hair, and their teeth were like lions’ teeth.

They say terrible terrible things. They attack my character. They attack my integrity they say mean hurtful things. Why do they do that, because they have to blame someone for their short comings and failures?

They are failing and they can not say "I met someone that plays better than me." They accuse me of conspiring and they say I have picked a favorite when I walked onto the field.

2Pe 2:13 suffering harm as the wages for their harmful ways. By considering it a pleasure to carouse in broad daylight, they are stains and blemishes, indulging in their deceitful pleasures when they feast together with you.

In reality I do not even think about which team is at bat and which team is ahead. My focus is on the zone. Or my focus is on the feet and hands and the ball.

That is all I do, not even know which coach is bitching half the time. But..........

But..........

Sometimes one fucker gets up under my skin and festers too fast for even the lord to give me patients. These are the worst of the worst these are the ones that came onto the field looking for a reason to bitch at me. I almost can tell you at the plate meeting who the fucker is going to be.

Tit 3:11 You know that such a person is twisted by sin and is conscious of it himself.

Gen 37:26 Then Judah said to his brothers, “What profit is there if we kill our brother and cover up his blood?

And I will say, Yes I am able to make a mistake now and again. I even know when I made the mistake and I try to correct it.
I was at the plate and it was long day. And their girl could not put the ball over the plate no matter how hard {{I}} Tried to see the outside corner she was not there.

Luk 8:14 As for the seed that fell among thorns, these are the ones who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by the worries and riches and pleasures of life, and their fruit does not mature.

The coach was whining and bitching something fierce. At one point he stepped up to pretended to clean his shoes and said that my strike zone sucked.
I smiled as nice as I could and said "OK if you say so"

He said "I do say so".

I said "Aright then let us continue the game."

He said "No blue your zone is terrible"

OK.

No REAL BAAAAAAD

So you want to forfeit and not continue the game?

I did not say that.

Well actually you did. You see I said lets continue the game and you said no blue your zone is terrible.
That was not what I meant.
I am sorry but you need to get into the dug out cause we are about to start the next inning

Psa 43:1 Vindicate me, O God! Fight for me against an ungodly nation! Deliver me from deceitful and evil men!

Some more grousing, chirping, bitchin’, and crying.
He the bitchy coach walks up and asks where was the first strike?
Where is this conversation going?
Just tell me where the first strike was...down the middle?
Yeah sure where is the point of this conversation?
you do not know
No I do not understand the point of the conversation so it the conversation is over.
He goes and begins to make a production of telling everybody I do not remember the last 20 pitches in order and he does.

Pro 30:31 a strutting rooster, a male goat, and a king with his army around him.

Pro 12:5 The plans of the righteous are just; the counsels of the wicked are deceitful.

Finally I here "he sucks"
I call time and I motion for the coach to step over to me.
I say "Coach to stop being a dummy head."
He looks at me and says what?
Coach you are making as dummy head of your self and you are embarrassing your team because of your retarded act. Stop it now or you will be in the parking lot blue there is only 10 minutes left.
No you do not understand. I was told not to throw anybody out. So if I do, you had to have been a real ass. And I will make sure that the director knows what an ass you were.
You can not do that!
Yes I can and I have twice before.
I am not saying that I am special and I carry any special power I am just saying that if I toss a coach today it means that that coach was way too out of control. Every umpire scheduler knows that I am too nice and I am too easy when it comes to tossing.
Do I make my self clear?
Yes sir.

Psa 35:17 O Lord, how long are you going to just stand there and watch this? Rescue me from their destructive attacks; guard my life from the young lions

Then on another game I had an obstruction call. batter runner reaches first base and bumps into the first baseman and drops down a bit. I noticed that the first baseman has been forcing a wide turn by stepping into the track of the runner.
I throw out the delayed dead ball and protect the runner to second.
The defensive coach calls time and comes out.
Are you telling me that you think the runner would have been safe had she not collided with first baseman?
Yeah sure that is what I am saying.
There is no way she would have made it to the base.
Uh OK
She would not have made it!
Uh Ok but my call stands.
No she would not have made it!
Uh ok.
I want to talk to your partner.
Uh OK. (Long pause as he turns and takes a step) But it is my call and I am not asking for any help.
He is crushed. And slumps
That is a terrible call to be making this late in the game

Well sir had there been contact sooner the call would have been made sooner.

Rev 9:17 Now this is what the horses and their riders looked like in my vision: The riders had breastplates that were fiery red, dark blue, and sulfurous yellow in color. The heads of the horses looked like lions’ heads, and fire, smoke, and sulfur came out of their mouths.
I am in the parking lot changing between games from plate to field. Two more games.
And a dad passes by.

You suck as a umpire and he keeps going. Like a drive by.
Really? You suck as a woman.
He stops and turns.
I am not a woman!
Oh really? Then I guess you just suck! Have a nice day.
What is your name?
Reverend John Sleestaxx. And I extend my hand
He ignores my offer to shake hands.
I am going to tell the director what you said.
Ok but when the director hears how you made a personal comment you will be run out for the reminder of the tournament.
No I won't
Yes you will.
You sir are not allowed to make personal attacks on any official. It is stated in every rule book of every sport.
It is not! Yes it is it is followed by sportsmanship conduct being the judgment of the official and the official being the final say at any point during the game.
The director's name is Robert Schmidt. And he can be found right over there and I indicate the tournament table at the park entrance. I can take over there right now if you like and introduce him to you.
No you mind your own business.
And you have a nice day Dad!
What a cock sucker!
Anyway I go to my last and the game is close. We are the last game to play the fields are empty and the UIC and Tourney director are watching my game. I thought this was a good game for me and I did not hear any complaining. The time limit expired but visitor was up by one point after the third out.
The coaches start talking and they approach me and my partner.
Hey I know the time has expired but we really want to complete the game.
Can we pay you for some extra time?
My partner and I look at each other.
I turn and I say you can keep anything you were going to pay me it is for one half innings and I will do it by myself if my partner needs to go.
He says he does but he will stay for one half innings.
So I volunteer 20 minutes of my time for free so that these girls can play some more ball.
But I suck as an umpire and I am stupid.
The game ends with visitor holding their lead.
One my way home I stop at a store to get a soda.
In line behind me I hear hey blue you sucked today.
I turn and see a coach from earlier. No coach I did not suck! You failed to teach your team to execute and win you sir sucked as a coach and you want to blame it on me.
He stepped up and start to say something and I head butted him in the forehead his head snapped back and he fell back.
Everyone looked at me
And I will have this candy bar too.
I paid and left as they began to help the old fuck head up. Oh yeah he was like 50 years old.
The lesson here is take action.
Take responsibility for your future.
Take control of your game.
Play hard
Play right
And take no shit from old fuckers in the corner store.

The teen ministries will have an exhibition match in the teen center. it seems that there is a grudge match that needs to be played out since the boys lost to the girls a few weeks ago.
Shannon Lark will be refereeing the match and also providing the mid-match entertainment. 'Shannon you did bring your grinder right?'
The single mothers group would like to ask that some of the men who helped last month provide some contact information as they are needed for more assistance. There is a woman who is in need of a new roof. I know that there are enough strong backs that a new roof could be raised in a weekend.
Let us show up and show our support and help this family member out.
Drive carefully in the parking lot and remember not to honk as I will be out there with rocks.
Ecc 3:5
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

Go in peace and keep your pimp hand strong.

Strip Bar Evangelizing By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

I go into the flesh temple and save a soul or two

By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

I was asked to go to a topless bar to talk to a young lady that was a relative of a church going member. Not of this church but I was asked because this particular place the nature of the personality of the relative warranted my going because of my diplomatic abilities.

Well I walked into this den of inequity, this parlor of sin, A temple of the flesh. Yes that is what this place was! A temple of the flesh! There were many women there of various levels of beauty and wearing little to no clothing gyrating on the temple goers and tables of the patrons.

Rev 3:17
Because you say, “I am rich and have acquired great wealth, and need nothing,” but do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind, and naked,

Rev 16:15
(Look! I will come like a thief! Blessed is the one who stays alert and does not lose his clothes so that he will not have to walk around naked and his shameful condition be seen.)

Rev 17:16
The ten horns that you saw, and the beast – these will hate the prostitute and make her desolate and naked. They will consume her flesh and burn her up with fire.

I sat in the middle of the room at an empty table. The lights were low even on the stage. I chose this table because there was a single light in the ceiling that illuminated the table.

I placed my bible on the table opened to the book of Isaiah.

The girl I was to see, a pretty young thing, was on the stage. She danced at the pole turning and twirling around. She gyrated her hips and shook her backside in time to the music.

The music was loud but I could still hear my voice without yelling.

I began to read aloud.

Isa 21:2 I have received a distressing message: “The deceiver deceives, the destroyer destroys. Attack, you Elamites! Lay siege, you Medes! I will put an end to all the groaning!”

Isa 21:3 For this reason my stomach churns; cramps overwhelm me like the contractions of a woman in labor. I am disturbed by what I hear, horrified by what I see.

Isa 21:4 My heart palpitates, I shake in fear; the twilight I desired has brought me terror.

Isa 21:5 Arrange the table, lay out the carpet, eat and drink! Get up, you officers,
smear oil on the shields!

I guess the young woman could see that I was not watching her show because when she was done dancing she came directly to my table.

Why are you reading while I was dancing? Am I not beautiful enough for you or are you gay?

Then she saw that it was a bible and said "Worse you are a bible thumper."

I said "first of all I saw you dance. I have not called you any names. And you are very pretty."

But I am here because your parents are worried about you.

So they sent a priest.

I am not a priest that is catholic. I am a reverend. From the First Execration Church Of Odium Anathema.

“Whatever.”

No this is a special church. This church knows it is hard to be reverent in today’s' evil world of sinners and criminals that run the country and economy.

I provide special counseling and evangelizing.

Whatever. Look I have to work.

No you have to listen to me.

Unless you are going to pay twenty dollars for a lap dance I have to go over there. She pointed to some bearded construction types.

How about I give you twenty dollars and you talk to me.

Nope for that you have to spend eighty for the champagne room.

And she started to get up.

Twenty and we talk here.

Rom 13:13 Let us live decently as in the daytime, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in discord and jealousy.

"Nope" she said and she went over to the bearded gentlemen. They talked a bit she gestured towards me they handed her a bill and she began to dance. She pushed her breasts together and mashed them into the face of the gentleman and the group whooped and hollered.

She turned and sat on his lap and rubbed herself on his lap and his crew all watched and slapped the table.

Job 3:12 Why did the knees welcome me, and why were there two breasts that I might nurse at them?

He placed his hands on her hips and she politely moved them off. and then she turned around and began to shake her breasts in front of him again and his friends all hollered and then one of them slapped her behind and she stiffened but smiled at him and shook her finger playfully at him.

I jumped up and charged. They did not see me coming as they were too busy looking at the naked flesh of this young woman.

I brought the bible down and across the head of the spanker with such force that the binding broke and pages of the lords word flew like confetti across the table and rest of the crowd.

Rev 3:20 Listen! I am standing at the door and knocking! If anyone hears my voice and opens the door I will come into his home and share a meal with him, and he with me.

The other men stood and the girl fell to the floor.

I grabbed the gentleman with the bill by the back of the head and smashed his face into the table. he was either too drunk to get up or the table was harder than I thought because he just passed out

Joel 3:10 Beat your plowshares into swords, and your pruning hooks into spears! Let the weak say, ‘I too am a warrior!’ 3:11 Lend your aid and come, all you surrounding nations, and gather yourselves to that place.” Bring down, O Lord, your warriors!

His friend leapt onto me and we fell to the ground and began grappling.

Two bouncers came over and pulled us apart.

They did not expect me to turn so quickly as I spun and pushed my fist into the nose of my capture. His head snapped back and I kneed him directly into the testicles.

Lev 21:20 or a hunchback, or a dwarf, or one with a spot in his eye, or a festering eruption, or a feverish rash, or a crushed testicle.

He fell to his knees and I dropped him with a knee to the face. "God forgives you" is all I said to him and he fell back and looked at the ceiling.

Dan 5:6 Then all the color drained from the king’s face and he became alarmed. The joints of his hips gave way, and his knees began knocking together.

His knees became wet with urine he had pissed himself and now he feared his own mortality and I was the light that shown the way and I spoke dear merciful please forgive this ignorant servant and receive him into your glorious house. Amen

My assailant’s bouncer looked shocked and surprised by my swiftness. "Now the lord is very pissed at you though" and I punch the construction guy in the eye

Twice before the bouncer realized I was coming.

The bouncer let go of the construction guy and reached for me.

I jumped back and turned a bit so that my kick would catch him in the knee.

"The lord will heal you later brother"

Above the music you heard the joint snap! This was a sickening wet popping noise that only footballers and hardcore street fighters have heard, and now a topless dancer.

The customer had fallen back and was leaning on a table. He looked at me realized there was no more help and he held up his hands.

Stop? What is the matter? What do you want? He said

You sir need to stop worshiping the flesh. Get thee to church and ask for the lord’s righteous love and forgiveness.

Go now or I shall christen you as I have the rest.

He turned and pushed by the crowd that was gathering.

I saw the bartender coming with a bat out of the corner of my eye

Joel 3:12 Let the nations be roused and let them go up to the valley of Jehoshaphat, for there I will sit in judgment on all the surrounding nations.

Joel 3:13 Rush forth with the sickle, for the harvest is ripe! Come, stomp the grapes, for the winepress is full! The vats overflow. Indeed, their evil is great!

And I knew what was happening as the girl's eyes widened. I duck and came about as the bat passed my head.

I slammed my fist into the eye socket of the bartender and he fell back. I brought my left fist up into the jaw as he fell back. His teeth slapped together with a "click clack" and he dropped to the ground.

1Ki 21:19 Say to him, ‘This is what the Lord says: “Haven’t you committed murder and taken possession of the property of the deceased?”’ Then say to him,

‘This is what the Lord says: “In the spot where dogs licked up Naboth’s blood they will also lick up your blood – yes, yours!”’”

I looked at the girl nude and shaking in total fear.

"Young lady you must find another vocation! The owner will know that you asked me to come here and beat these men up."

"That is not true!" she whimpered

"No it is true as I am a man of the cloth and I do not lie"

She looked about at the carnage and the beat and broken men. And said,

“Your god must be strong and your conviction in his word must be very mighty to have taken so many men and reduced them to little whimpering boys.”

I held my hand to her and she took it.

We left and I have given her a room in the rectory so that we can begin proper counseling and vocational rehabilitation.

2Pe 3:14 Therefore, dear friends, since you are waiting for these things, strive to be found at peace, without spot or blemish, when you come into his presence.

Gen 44:4 They had not gone very far from the city when Joseph said to the servant who was over his household, “Pursue the men at once! When you overtake them, say to them, ‘Why have you repaid good with evil?

She has been given the job of co-coordinating the sinners into the proper groups and also answering the phone for appointments.

I have sent her to the women’s groups for proper social exercises and practice.

I believe that she will become a valuable member of our church.

I will be in the parking lot shaking hands and heads. Please remember that honking brings out the worst possible mood in me and that you all need to behave all week mot just the hour you are here. You need to behave in the parking lot.

SLOW THE FUCK DOWN.

The felon program has been canceled as certain groups have found that my method of counseling is brutal and rough. It works! But it is rough and they think that it is unfair to put these known criminals in the ring with a pastor. To get the good word and the lord’s love beaten into them.

You know these tree huggers are starting to make me upset.

Oh well the lord will show them all the way soon enough.



Gen 18:19 I have chosen him so that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just. Then the Lord will give to Abraham what he promised him.”

Go in peace and be happy

Remember to keep your pimp hand strong.